Wednesday, July 22, 2015

Growing Up Not Apart

Monday I met two of my best friends from college (they are still two of my absolute bestest friends) for lunch. The three of us haven't been together since I've had Landry. We had all seen each other separately but not together (doesn't it get so much more difficult after college when everyone is spread out?). It was a wonderful lunch and I loved being reunited with my favorite people.

As I was getting ready to meet my friends for lunch that morning I started realizing how different my morning was probably going than their morning. See I started getting ready for a 12:30pm lunch at roughly 7:30am. Landry was still asleep and I knew once she woke up it would be a million times harder to put makeup on with an almost 1 year old trying to play in the toilet and each trash.

I wrestled with deciding to go ahead and get dressed. Getting dressed without Landry under my feet is a lot easier because she isn't pulling clothes off hangers and dragging out every pair of shoes I own. However, at the same time I run the risk of Landry getting something on my clothes once she wakes up. What is it with kids and their sticky hands? I swear you give them a bath and 5 minutes later they have sticky nasty hands.

Throwing caution to the wind I went ahead and got dressed which ended up being a task in itself. I knew my friends were going to look cute, you know what I'm talking about. 20-something cute where it looks like they've gotten plenty of sleep and not worried if the other human in the next room is still breathing while they are laying there asleep. The kind of cute where they are wearing dresses that they don't worry will expose everything the good Lord gave them because they aren't constantly having to bend down to pick up a rambunctious 1 year old. The kind of cute where even though it is 97 degrees outside and 100% humidity outside they still look absolutely adorable and perfect.

Every fiber of my being wanted to just through on a pair of shorts and a tee because it is so stupid hot outside and shorts are so much easier when out and about with a baby. But I resisted and chose the dress I owned that I felt looked cute but would show sweat the least amount (since having Landry I sweat worse than ever!). Sadly, the mom pooch was making its appearance a little more known so I had to wear a pair of Spanx. Oh how I loathe Spanx and oh how they make me even hotter. I NEVER wear them but I felt the need to not look like a frumpy stay-at-home mom with her mom pooch that might not ever go away so I decided to grin and bear it.

After getting dressed I noticed Landry was still not awake and instead of getting to relish the one morning of my daughter actually sleeping past 5:30am I started worrying over how it would affect her naps. If she didn't wake up soon she wouldn't get in her first nap before lunch, which means she is going to get cranky, which means she is going to get clingy, which means I am going to barely be able to enjoy lunch. For the record, she didn't wake up till 9:30am which meant no nap before lunch, and all those things I said would occur did indeed occur. It might have been a self-fulling prophecy but I digress.

Instead of being excited about catching up with my best friends I was concerned about being the married old lady with nothing interesting to share. They would be able to talk about their successful careers, new boyfriends, going to the gym, going clubbing, etc. What would have to talk about? "Hey you guys, we are laying down new laminate flooring this weekend. Going to get wild up in here!" "Landry and I hit up a new kid's museum, it was pretty sweet." I am not jealous of the lives they are leading, I am very content with where I am in life and couldn't be happier staying home with Landry (well more mom friends would make me a little happier), but at the same time I want to feel that connection.

Mom life makes the life of a twenty-something look very different. I know my morning, my worries, my struggles are not the same as my friends. However, I know when I think back to that lunch I'm not going to remember the worrying, the sandwich I didn't get to eat because of a fussy baby, what I wore. Instead I will remember the laughing, the catching up, my friends helping with my daughter, walking around our college campus together.

We are growing up and growing in very different ways, but it does not mean we have to grow apart.


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