Tuesday, March 10, 2015

Sick Days

When I became a stay-at-home mom I don't think I realized that meant no more days off work, no more holidays (I mean I get to celebrate but it isn't a break by any means), and no more sick days.

Last Wednesday evening I noticed I had a sore throat that just kept getting worse. Daniel went to the store that night and got me some Ricolas, ginger ale (my tummy wasn't feeling great), and cream cheese danish (because it's delicious and I was sick so I milked it for what it was worth). 

Thursday I woke up not feeling any better, probably a little bit worse. I have never been one to have real sore throats. Scratchy/itchy- yes. Sore- no. I asked Daniel if he could stay home to help out with Landry, but unfortunately he couldn't. Financials for end of month had to be done and one of his co-workers was going to be out so he HAD to be there. Add he is also mentoring a high school student and she was coming at 3:00pm that day to meet with Daniel.

Even though I didn't feel well, I didn't get a break. Landry still refused to take more than a 30 minute nap at a time, she was still teething, she still was mildly constipated, and she was still fussy as can be. 

You want to know what makes being sick even worse? Mom guilt. I felt guilty for just wanting to lay in bed, I felt guilty for having no patience with Landry, I felt getting for not talking to Landry enough or playing with her enough.

At one point she woke up for her measly little nap crying and I got her up and told her in a very serious/logical tone:

"Landry, you need to stop crying. I have given you every opportunity today to nap and you have chosen not to take it. That's fine if you chose not to sleep but you cannot be fussy as a result because it was your choice." 

Seriously?? Like my 7 month old daughter understood that logic? I felt like she was out to make my already tough day even harder. She's a baby for god sake! So naturally I then felt guilty for thinking Landry was trying to be difficult. 

This post isn't for anyone to feel sorry for me. But I appreciate when other moms don't always paint motherhood as sunshine and rainbows. As rewarding as being a mom is it is also tough! 

So here's to new days where we get to start over fresh. Here's to knowing that the tough days aren't going anywhere but they are worth it because look at this precious life we are getting to be a part of and raise. But also here's to being honest that it is hard and it is indeed work. 

How do you make it through being sick when you have a child to take care of? What mom guilt have you been experiencing lately? 


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